We finally had a serious talk about delivery with the doctor today. I’ve been fighting HORRIBLE labor pains. I’m popping so many pills I feel like a drug dealer! No joke – I bet I have 10 bottles of medication.
The doctor I saw today wasn’t my normal doctor. Dr. O’Brien is supposed to be really renowned in his field. He’s come up with a way for women who leak water too soon and risk labor – to patch it up.
Anyways – I was putting a little pressure on him to get these babies out because I’m in constant labor – or so it feels. They’re nearly 5lbs – I’m 33 weeks – it seems like they should be okay. He told me he delivers multiples nearly every day. Looking at the babies and running a few tests he said if he delivered the babies right now – they would spend no less than 2 weeks on breathing machines. Weight doesn’t matter when it comes to lung development.
I told him I delivered Gabriel at 32 weeks and he was in the NICU but he got Pneumonia which was working against him more so than immature lungs. He told me that a single pregnancy and a twin pregnancy aren’t the same thing. A set of twins at 32 weeks aren’t as strong as a single baby at 32 weeks.
So needless to say – I’m still being pumped with meds to stop the labor. I would never want to put the babies at risk and I understand better after talking to Dr. O’Brien. No mother wants to see their baby hooked up to tubes and machines- I remember that too well with Gabriel. I just felt like we were out of the woods now. We basically are – because they should survive – – but we’re not as far as keeping them out of the NICU.
There is still a selfish part of me that feels like I can’t do this anymore. My back hurts so much from the contractions – I feel like I can barely breathe – my blood pressure is so low it makes me feel like I just got off the Tea Cups ride – – the medications make me want crawl out of my skin – – and I cry nearly every day. I have Gabriel’s NICU picture as my screen saver on my computer to remind myself what it’s all about. I NEVER thought we’d make it this far with all the problems and scares we’ve had. It’s just now that we are here and constantly fighting labor- It’s a lot harder than I thought it would be……..