Over the last week I’ve been preparing for our trip back to Haiti. For some reason I was unsettled about coming back. There was some anxiety and I NEVER feel anxiety about coming home.
It was 2am and I had the TV on in the background while I was booking tickets for a brand new group of 50 that was coming to Haiti in early March. The TV has music channels and I had placed it on the Christian music station. I wasn’t really paying attention to anything but there was a moment when I stopped concentrating so hard on what I was doing and just took a breath. In that moment – I heard the whispers of my Jesus slowly speaking to me through the words of a song. The next morning I got an encouraging email from a friend who listed the lyrics of the same song I heard that night. Now I know it was a whisper from above – a whisper saying HE WILL OVERCOME. (I listed the song down below).
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The girls had spent the weekend with my friend Angel. They always pick up new songs when they’re at her house. Anything from BARBIE GIRL to We Are The Redeemed!! It’s very random sometimes. LOL! We had taken the girls out to eat after their weekend with Angel. Again there was some anxiety thinking about all that we had to do before we leave. Afterall – my family does get 16 bags of luggage!! The girls were singing and talking in the back and I had tuned them out thinking about all we had to do. I took a break from my thoughts and a long deep breath…..and in the back of the van I heard from the sweetest little voices :
We can’t go on – Pretending day by day – – – -That someone, somewhere will soon make a change
We are all a part of – God’s great big family – – – And the truth, you know love is all we need
We are the world. We are the children. We are the ones to make a brighter day so let’s start giving. There’s a choice we’re making. We’re saving our own lives. It’s true we make a brighter day just you and me.
I’m listening to the girls sing this song with no music in the background. I can only imagine they heard it at Angel’s house. They memorized nearly the entire song. No doubt in that moment – God was whispering to His anxious daughter driving the little white mini-bus.
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We are back in Haiti now and life is completely busy and overwhelming. Since the quake – we’ve had so many more emails and groups wanting to come to Haiti. I work until the wee hours of the morning – only to have another full day of work ahead of me. I haven’t really been facebooking or even blogging because I simply don’t have time.
God protected little ears and little eyes from seeing much when we landed in Port-au-Prince. I couldn’t help but notice the hundreds of tents and tarps. Even people with homes that are still standing aren’t sleeping in them. Aftershocks continue. At the airport some of my friends told me how they watched their house on Monday lean to the left and then to the right when they were hit with yet again – a4.7 aftershock.
Thanks to the prayers of so many our family made it home safe and sound. It was a very long 2 days of traveling but God’s protection was so evident that the anxieties I had were completely gone before we even landed in Port-au-Prince.
I was back in my office and back to being busy rather quickly. As always after every trip I have to the states – there was a line outside the office of people needing to see me. I was so tired from traveling and had so much to do I didn’t want to stop. Forgetting that I was God’s personal assistant – I barely listened to what people were telling me and just politely nodded wondering if today was ever going to end.
Before actually calling it a day – I stopped in the silence of my office and took a breath. I noticed my little calendar on my desk. Someone had already flipped it to February 25th. It reads – God can’t stop thinking about you! If you could count His thoughts of you “they would be more in number than the sand”.
I could barely listen to the line of people at my door because my thoughts were on what I needed to do today AND YET – my Father in Heaven cannot get His mind off of me. I’m all He thinks about. You are all He thinks about. Even though His tasks are so many – He still CANNOT stop thinking about me.
In that moment – when the chaos of the day had finished – I heard Him whispering to me – Jody – in all that you do – in the many tasks that are before you – don’t forget to think about ME.
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This is the thing that God is teaching me right now. I can’t hear His whispers until I take a deep breath. I can’t hear His gentle voice unless I actually listen for it. I can’t feel His nudging unless I just stop for a few moments. My mind tells me I don’t have time to stop – to be still. But my heart tells me if I don’t – I will miss out on this beautiful conversation Jesus wants to have with me.
It is in the stillness – that is in the midst of chaos – that God speaks to me. His gentle voice brings clarity and comfort and this unsurpassing peace. I’m going to miss it – I’m going to overshadow Him – if I don’t take time to stop – and just breathe.
– – – Song I heard late at night – –
Everything Falls
You said – You’d never leave or forsake me
When you said, – This life is gonna shake me
You said – This world is gonna bring trouble on my soul – This I know
When everything falls apart
Your arms hold me together
When everything falls apart
You’re the only hope for this heart
When everything falls apart
And my strength is gone
I find you mighty and strong
You keep holding on
You keep holding on
When I see – The darkness all around me
When I see – The tragedy has found me
I still believe – Your faithful arms will never let me go – And still I know
Sorrow may last for the night – But hope is rising with the sun
Its rising with the sun – There will be storms in this life
But I know – – – You will overcome