Posted in Personal Stories

Just a little girl…

I must say – I have thoroughly enjoyed the last few weeks working in my clinic. I forgot how much I missed the day-to-day interactions that come along with providing medical care.

There are days that I can’t help but chuckle!  There is always a funny story or situation that causes me to laugh! 

I had the sweetest elderly man come to me two weeks ago with dizziness. I checked his blood pressure and it was 155/95.  For the first time I actually had BP medications. So I placed him on Lisinopril. Yesterday he came back to me and was reporting that the dizziness had come back. I took his blood pressure but it was normal. I asked him if he had done anything different. He told me, “No, I don’t think so.  In fact, I’ve been feeling so good I’m evening drinking rum again!” I asked him if he thought it could be the alcohol making him dizzy and you could see him really reflect, “Hmm….maybe!”

There are days where I can’t help but blush or flinch!

I forget sometimes how non-modest my patients can be. I will let a patient in and briefly talk to someone on the porch –  only to come in and find them totally exposed waiting to show me something!! They have no trouble whipping things out for me to look at! I always tease them  – ALL they had to do was TELL ME they had a sore or bump. I don’t always need to SEE IT!! HA! HA! HA! HA!!

There are days where love abounds – as I watch the interaction between a father and his child. 

There are times that I see precious daddies bringing in their little sick babies. I love to see how gently they hold them and how truly concerned they are. I’ve watched some really beautiful bonds and seen pure loving embraces. I have a sweet papa who brings his 1-month-old baby to me every week wanting me to see if the little sores on her body are getting better. He’ll ask me a dozen times if she’s going to be okay.

Then there are days like today – where sorrow breaks down my clinic doors and flash floods my heart. 

There was a precious little girl who came to my clinic today all by herself. I asked her how old she was and she told me she was 9 years old.  I told her she was too little for me to see by herself and to go get her mom or dad. She put her head down and said that her parents were busy. I told her that I would open my clinic at any time. So as soon as one of her parents were free she can come back to see me.

As I went to escort her out of the clinic she said, “Wait. Please. I am in pain. It really hurts.”

Trembling she begins to explain to me where she hurts and shows me her sores & lesions.  She wouldn’t tell me her name. She told me she was ashamed. I asked her if a man in her family did this  – and she immediately put her head down.

As tears flowed down her cheeks – tears flooded down my face. This brave little girl came to my clinic alone. The beautiful little girl has experienced pain that no child should ever experience. This precious little girl was robbed of her innocence and scarred in all ways.

She’s just a little girl  – with the sweetest smile you’ve ever seen.

With pigtails & purple barrettes – and the most beautiful brown eyes.

With raggedy shorts & shirt  – and dirty green flip-flops.

A child of the living God – the daughter of the only King.

Tonight I’m on my knees  – circling the children of the Mole –  overwhelmed – confused – irate – broken –  weeping – desperate – before my Lord…..

Posted in Personal Stories

Our Election Day!

In the past, the pastor’s wife was the head of our women’s group. This meant she had total control of all the finances as well. We recently found out that she left with all the offering money for the group. Our women are very poor and sacrifice to give every penny. They’ve been saving for over a year for uniforms for the choir & songbooks for the group. It was very devastating for them.

Our Haitian women have asked us to take them deeper into the Word. So we are spending the next 6 weeks studying James. How fitting today that we learn  –

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.

Believers in humble circumstances ought to take pride in their high position. 10 But the rich should take pride in their humiliation—since they will pass away like a wild flower. 11 For the sun rises with scorching heat and withers the plant; its blossom falls and its beauty is destroyed. In the same way, the rich will fade away even while they go about their business.

12 Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him.

13 When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; 14 but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. 15 Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.

16 Don’t be deceived, my dear brothers and sisters. 17 Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. 18 He chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created.


Having dealt with the drama we’ve had here for the last month – our study today couldn’t have been more perfect! We are learning together as a group – as we move forward – to count it all as joy!!

We decided it was time to have a women’s committee. So today we held elections!! The women have NEVER had a chance to vote for anything like this before. So we spent some time today figuring out how we should do this.

Much like our elections in the states – it was a little chaotic!!

Today we voted for our Women’s Group Committee – President, Vice President, Secretary, & Treasurer.

Now it was pretty hilarious hearing them speak to each other about who the candidates could be.  I felt like I should be hearing – I’m Tizzie (orphan manager) and I approve this message!!

One lady stood up and said, To be a candidate you needed to be married”.

Another lady stood up and said  –Well that’s not fair. I’m single I should be a candidate”.

The same lady from before stood up and said, “Look – we all know you have a boyfriend at your house at night. So until you kick him out or get married – you can’t be the leader”! (She immediately sat back down).

Then another lady said,  What about Miss Beth? She’s single. She should be a candidate!” They all agreed.

Another lady stood up and wanted to be a candidate. They told her, “You gossip too much. Until you learn to control your tongue – you can’t be one of the leaders!” (She immediately sat back down).

Tizzie stood up and said, “The leaders should be from the Mole. That way no one gets mad at our staff”.

To my surprise several women said, – Everyone here in this circle lives in the Mole. We’re all from the Mole!!”

Seriously – the women are so calmly calling each other out on why they should or shouldn’t be a candidate! It was quite the spectacle to watch. And yet no one got up and left! It’s like they all accepted their imperfections with little quarrel.

When it ended we had 8 candidates to choose from. What is funny is that back when the pastor’s wife was running the group – we were lucky to even have 8 women coming to our bible study! Now we fill every bench!

Every woman went to Jocelyn  – one by one to cast her vote. The 4 who have the highest number of votes will be on the committee.

After Jocelyn and I counted the votes – our top 4 people were: Momma Gigi, Mme Nene, Mme Prophet, & Miss Beth!!!

Three of these ladies are from St. Louis! Many of you know that when we fired our pastor – he turned the church against our staff! Now the church is voting for our very staff to run our women’s group!  – Does anyone else find that interesting?? 😀

What a crazy day!! What a crazy month!! Only God could predict this election today!!

Posted in Personal Stories

This Little Light of Mine…

This Little Light of Mine

Posted on October 19, 2012 by coachin4christ

When I was back in the states I came across this song below by Addison Road. It has stuck with me and has been both a reminder and a declaration that I want to keep my little light shining. As we serve the community of Mole St. Nicholas, Haiti we have been deeply burdened by the abuse, prostituting of their children and slavery. I’d like you to read the latest blog that Jody has wrote that speaks great volumes to this and gives you a better glimpse of what we are facing.

With all of it this song just resonates even more in my heart. I know that it continues to be a growing problem  as statics are showing that there are 27 million who are enslaved by sex trafficking alone. We know that women and children alike are being held against their will for profit. The pornographic industry is thriving all around the world and in some countries including our own (USA) it is becoming more and more o.k. as we become desensitized to what we are watching and we see programming getting edgier. Even here in the Mole there is a place where these films are watched, as many crowd around an old set.

How can ones Light Shine when a moral standard is not here. In the states we raise all types of controversy for having the 10 commandments in our court houses. If you want to fight over this maybe you should decide to take a trip to Haiti!!! Then ask yourself if the 10 Commandments are so wrong. (Yes I am up on a soap box…figuratively speaking:>)

I knew when I chose to obey what the Lord wanted me to do that along the way there would be times like we have right now. I knew it would be hard. I knew it would be heartbreaking and that there would be times where I would throw my hands into the air and say God…what do I do? Show me the way. Do what seems impossible and make it possible. Lord…BE GLORIFIED THROUGH IT ALL!!!

This song translates it all and I am grateful and blessed to be called His child. I grateful and blessed that, like Caleb…if you read Jody’s blog:>) I have a different spirit. I am grateful and blessed that He uses me to share His story of Redemtion. I am blessed and grateful to walk this road together with the Castillo’s. I am blessed and grateful for NWHCM family. I am blessed and grateful for the struggles…for without the struggles we wouldn’t see God’s hand at work. I am blessed and grateful for the precious children for they are the generation that can change this community and even the country!!!

Pray for these precious children that they will grow in wisdom and stature and love the Lord with all their heart, mind, soul and strength.

How are you letting your Light Shine?


This little flame inside a song…some shine bright and some shine small…The rains will come and the waters rise…but don’t you ever lose your light.
In this life you will know…love and pain, joy and sorrow…so when it hurts and when times get hard don’t forget who’s child you are.

This little light of mine…I’m gonna let it shine…this little light of mine…I’m gonna let it shine, gonna let it shine.

May you live each day with no regret…make the most of every chance you get..let your eyes get wide when you look at the stars, with the same sense of wonder as a child’s heart…with the ones you love, treasure the time and for those who are gone keep their memories alive…hold onto your dreams, don’t ever let go, there’s a fire inside you burning with hope.


There will be days when you want to give up and the clouds settle in…but after the rain comes the sun don’t you ever forget…don’t forget…child don’t forget.


One day there will be no more pain and we will finally see Jesus face…so until then I’m gonna try to brave the dark and let my little light shine.

This little light of mine…I’m gonna let it shine…this little light of mine

(song by Addison Road)

These are candid pics from the kids free dancing to this song in the mornings. I can’t tell you how it warms my heart when I hear them singing these songs outside of class. The group pics were them trying to jump at the same time. I could never get them in the air:>) Their faces are priceless though!!!

Posted in Personal Stories

Merry Monday…

What an AMAZING DAY!! I just want to thank the Lord for giving me today! Most people don’t look forward to Mondays – but I think it might be my new favorite day!

Everyone knows I’m not a morning person! I’m a night owl! But this morning for no particular reason I woke up at 6:30am! (I know most of you are probably up by 5am but I don’t usually go to bed until 2am!)

The generator/solar was out. So there wasn’t any electricity! Erica, Miss Beth, and I have started doing a Bible Study together – JAMES by Beth Moore! So I used this time to dive into my homework for that day.

Thirty minutes later and there is still no power and I cannot sleep! So I read another chapter from Praying Circles Around Your Children!

Twenty minutes later and still no power and I cannot sleep! So I started reading JUMP – Life Transformation by Jeff Baird – a Pastor from Pleasant Valley Baptist Church. Back in August I was able to meet with him and discuss the abuse issues here in the Mole.  Unfortunately there’s been so much drama here I haven’t had the chance to dive into it like I had hoped! WOW – I could barely put it down!

Forty minutes later and still no power and I cannot sleep! I feel like I’ve read just about everything I can read! HA!  It’s hot but I’m glad I didn’t have power all morning! I might have been tempted to hang out on facebook or check my email – and I would have lost this quiet time with God!

I had a few phone calls to make this morning and then I got the pleasure of giving away 3 donkeys to 3 families who desperately needed them!  To read about it click here –

I had clinic this afternoon. Typically I run a pediatric clinic. But with all the adult medication I now have – I opened it up to everyone! I had 5 precious granmoun come into my clinic today! All of them had blood pressure issues and were dizzy. I actually had blood pressure medication in my clinic for the first time! I know I was helping them – but I was also healing my own soul.

So I have all of this equipment now  – tests and machines that our last medical team left! I haven’t had the chance to use it! So I had Miss Beth come down so she could be my lab rat!! HA! HA!

She has been feeling under the weather so we decided to do a full work-up! Well that was the plan!  I haven’t had any equipment to do any lab work and I haven’t stuck someone in probably 5 years when we were living in St. Louis.

It took us almost an hour to understand how to test for mono!! You should have seen us trying to read the directions!!!

Then we had trouble using the lancets to poke her finger!! Thank goodness she is a good sport! I had to stick her twice because the little contraption wouldn’t work at first!! I felt like we were Lucy and Ethel!

This afternoon we went on to Haitian Women’s Bible Study. So Beth, Erica, Angela (a team member), and myself headed to the church! Before our recent drama  – our class had dropped to 5 or 6 people because many of the ladies had issues with the Pastor’s wife.  Since her dismissal  – we had 70 ladies at our Women’s Conference and 24-30 showing up regularly for our weekly meetings!

Today we got so caught-up in the Word and discussing how we would be moving forward that we ended up meeting an extra 30 minutes! We spent time praying for each other! We spent time talking about what we want for our class! We sang, prayed, and laughed! WOW – I have really missed that! The last few weeks I have wondered if I would ever be able to laugh with our ladies again!

Kathie has been with us the last two weeks and EVERYBODY knows she rocks-out the kitchen! We came back home to the tenderest cut of roast beef & no-bake cookies!!

Tonight we read to the kids and we end that time having them repeat a prayer! It’s not only important to pray over them – but to also TEACH THEM how to pray!

Jose and I take turns pulling each of them out of their room and praying for them individually! It’s very interesting to pray for the boys. Tonight I asked Asher what he wants me to pray for – and I quote – “Pray that I will quit poopin’ in my diaper because I’m tired of the smell!”  I couldn’t agree more!

I am SO grateful for this beautiful day – full of quiet time in His presence, the blessings of giving to those in need, laughter and healing in the clinic, and the purest joy meeting with my Haitian ladies!

Posted in Personal Stories

Rise During The Night…

Rise during the night and cry out. Pour out your hearts like water to the Lord. Lift up your hands to him in prayer, pleading for your children. Lamentations 2:19 NLT

Last night our big generator had a mechanical issue. We have a small 2K yellow-portable generator we use for back-up here at our house. We also use it on Sundays and to show movies downtown or in other villages.

Jose went to get it and we realized that it was stolen on Tuesday night. We have lived in the Mole for over 2 years now and have never had any major theft. It was stolen off the enclosed porch of our kitchen.

I was FURIOUS! Satan has waged war on us since we moved here but he’s gotten pretty fierce over the last few months. He just won’t stop! He’s that buzzing mosquito that I swat at all day long and can’t seem to get rid of.

It was 8:30 at night when the power went out. Jose was busy trying to fix the generator and I had all the kids upstairs. After playing with our flashlights and glow sticks –  it was time for bed at 9pm.

So I got out their Ryobi battery-powered fans and tucked them in. I went to check on them again at 10:30pm. The twins must have been playing with their fans earlier because after only an hour and a half they were dead.

Typically we have a window fan in their room that helps cool the children down. Mikela, Rosie, Malaya, Gabe, Asher, & Levi all sleep together in one room.

When I walked in their room at 10:30pm (still without power) – Asher was having a seizure on the floor. In just that short amount of time – the heat got the best of him.

My anger hit a whole new level – and I bursted into tears. Using a flashlight I took Asher into the bathroom and tried to cool him down with water. I gave Asher my Ryobi fan and put him in bed with me. My mind was reeling….

I just started reading the book Praying Circles Around Your Children. I decided I was going to read by flash light to try to calm myself down. I opened the book to Chapter 3 and this was what was written on the page:

Rise during the night and cry out. Pour out your hearts like water to the Lord. Lift up your hands to him in prayer, pleading for your children. Lamentations 2:19 NLT

So that’s what I did. I put my book down and I started walking circles around my bed – pouring my heart out to the Lord – pleading for no more seizures tonight. The more I prayed the less angry I became. The more I prayed the more empowered I felt.

My house has 2 doors in every room. You can literally walk circles in my home. So that’s what I did. As I walked through the children’s rooms – seeing them hugging their battery fans –  still covered in sweat – I began to pray even more for them. That they would know God has a plan for their lives and that their suffering serves a greater purpose.

I began to reflect on my own words I was praying for my children. If their suffering can serve a greater purpose – than so can mine. I started to realize that had the power not gone out – I would not have prayed so desperately & passionately for my children – certainly not that night.

And what satan meant for harm – God used to strengthen my faith!

All satan did was force this mother to rise during the night, cry out to God, and pray….

Posted in Personal Stories


This past week I was in Duluth, GA for the Catalyst Conference. WOW!! Such an amazing time with my Lord! I felt His undeniable presence as He came down from heaven and met me right there where I was. I heard Him speak over me – power, courage, & strength!  I had a moment of complete oneness with Him that I still cannot put into words! Awesome!

As always – I’m still processing all the amazing things I learned! I am broken, encouraged, empowered, challenged, humbled, convicted, overwhelmed, and restored! Awesome!

I had random people – God’s people – come and pray for me out of nowhere! I had folks tell me that God just nudged them to lay hands on me – and they didn’t even know my name! I was humbled every single time. And it happened NUMEROUS times! Awesome!

Through the efforts of a special friend – Mark Batterson author of The Circle Maker –  had a special prayer time with Jose and I this past Wednesday. Those of you who’ve been to Haiti have heard my testimony of what this book has meant to our family and how it completely changed the way we pray. It was very humbling and such an honor to have this special prayer time where he laid hands on us and circled our ministry in prayer. Awesome!

I flew out of Haiti last week completely discouraged and emptied – tired & weak. I’m flying back in with power, courage & strength! I know that the battles are waiting for me as I fly into Haiti in the morning. I know the opposition is ready to attack! I know that satan is furious that he didn’t defeat me….although he got really close! But I REFUSE to let him win! Awesome!

There were so many AWESOME sermons that I’m still chewing on! I remember Beth Moore talking at one of our past conferences that you need to ‘Eat it before you Tweet it’. So before I blog about it – I’m trying to absorb it!

I heard this song for the first time at Catalyst –  called Awesome from Charles Jenkins. I have since downloaded it and listened to it at least 50 times – and I still cry at the  last verse every time!

It’s my new anthem coming back into Haiti. I can’t wait to teach our women’s group this new song! I pray it encourages them the way it has me!

Pastor Charles Jenkins
Awesome lyrics – AWESOME






Posted in Personal Stories

Just call me – Big Bird…

Matthew 10:26-33 The Message

26-27 “Don’t be intimidated. Eventually everything is going to be out in the open, and everyone will know how things really are. So don’t hesitate to go public now. 

28 “Don’t be bluffed into silence by the threats of bullies. There’s nothing they can do to your soul, your core being. Save your fear for God, who holds your entire life—body and soul—in his hands.


Forget About Yourself

29-31 “What’s the price of a pet canary? Some loose change, right? And God cares what happens to it even more than you do. He pays even greater attention to you, down to the last detail—even numbering the hairs on your head! So don’t be intimidated by all this bully talk. You’re worth more than a million canaries. 

32-33 “Stand up for me against world opinion and I’ll stand up for you before my Father in heaven. If you turn tail and run, do you think I’ll cover for you?

Jose & I flew back into Haiti on September 14th to deal with some drama we were having at our church. We had dismissed our pastor in August (before we flew to the states). We learned early in September that he was still in the Mole, refusing to leave. In just a few short weeks, the pastor and a few of his friends turned the town against the mission and our St. Louis staff. Lies and deceit overtook the town  – nearly destroying our work.


“Don’t be bluffed into silence by the threats of bullies.”

My first Sunday back I met with the entire church.  While this meeting was only open to the church body, the Pastor invited other people to stand up in his defense. Giving credit to the Godly teaching already implanted in the people, the church understood my reasons for dismissing the pastor and was ready to move forward.

However once I got them calmed down – one of the non-church members would belt out something and get everyone upset again. It was an ugly 4-hour meeting full of hate and lies – screaming and fighting. In Kentucky, we’d call that a family reunion! But here in Haiti in this context, it was mortiphying.

At one point we had to pull people apart. I ended up walking out of the meeting but not before making it clear that the decision was final and we would be moving forward.

What came next I’m sure was meant to intimidate us. After the meeting that night the pastor’s friends tried to burn down our church. They caught our pulpit on fire which was full of  – communion trays, offering plates, Bibles, songbooks, registries, Sunday school material, etc. They burned a hole in the side of our tent. Our security guard saw the fire and rushed to put it out before it took down the whole church. The police and mayor were immediately involved and the town was outraged that someone would try to burn down the House of God. An investigation began to take place.

The next day our St. Louis staff woke up to voodoo curses and threatening letters on their porch. The pastor’s posse was going to run them out of town.

Our staff spent the week praying! None of them could eat or sleep. We spent the week in complete disarray – how could this happen? We felt defeated, deflated, & honestly – ready to quit! I can tell you that Matthew 10:26 was no longer just something that happened way back when  – it was happening here and now!

We had an American team scheduled to come in on the Friday following this meeting. We weren’t sure if we could even have the planned revival or medical clinic. For the first time, we really weren’t sure if the town could handle it.

We received word that there would be a protest on Sunday morning at church. We had an American scheduled to preach and Jocelyn (who took the brunt of all the persecution) could not interpret. The town had made it very clear they did not want to hear from him.


“He pays even greater attention to you, down to the last detail…”

On Sunday I arrive to church early – prepared to send the Americans back to my house should we indeed have a protest. The courtyard of the church was empty. Instead, we walked into the church, missing only about 30 members, where we were embraced! The service was somber. There was no hate – but you could feel the sadness. The church leaders prayed for us – each staff member – by name! They called on the church to repent for their actions and prayed for God to have mercy on them. They also asked Jocelyn to pray at the end of the service.

Because of the drama at the church – we decided not to hold any activities there. The medical clinic was held in the employee homes & later at my house. The women’s conference was held at our house.


“Stand up for me against world opinion and I’ll stand up for you before my Father in heaven.”

At one point we were told that NO ladies would be attending our women’s conference.  Our women’s group had dwindled down from 60 people attending regularly to 8 people. We knew this was because of issues they had with the pastor’s wife.

So we were prepared for no one to show up. But we had 70 ladies EVERY day! The revival each night had hundreds of people in attendance!

The medical clinic did operations on hundreds of patients! The town that was so cold to us when we arrived September 14th – completely changed and embraced us this week! The mayor went on the radio and said he would not lose NWHCM for any one person.

The truth was revealed this week & many have apologized to our staff. Please continue to pray for those of us on the battlefield. This has been a very painful & heart-breaking time for our ministry. But we proudly wear the armor of God and we know we don’t fight alone!

“So don’t be intimidated by all this bully talk. You’re worth more than a million canaries

Then I guess you can just call me Big Bird…