I’ve blogged a lot about my best friend’s mom – Kandiance. I remember sitting at the funeral and hearing all these wonderful things about her. Talk about a true woman of God – someone who gave of herself all the way up until the very end – witnessing the last few days she lived. You see Kandiance knew something that I realized at the funeral. It’s something I’ve begun to tell myself every day and I feel like I’m supposed to share this with you tonight as well.

I don’t know how well you will receive it but I just want to put it out there…… It’s just not about you! It’s just not about me. It’s not about the story of Jody Castillo and 7 kids and being a missionary in Haiti. It’s not about your story  – or what you do every day.

Kandiance lived a life where she knew it wasn’t about her – but it was ALWAYS about Him. If it was her story then it would have ended when she died – – but it’s HIS story and therefore even in death the pages are still be written – because I was witnessed too after she left this world.

Here is the point I want to make – – It’s not about YOUR story – it’s about His Story and HE is choosing the role you will play and inevitably that role should lead people to the unsurpassing love, restoration, and reconciliation of Jesus Christ.

For the past 9 months – I made everything about me. I was so worried about who was on my side – I lost sight of WHO’S SIDE I AM ON. You see if all you care about is playing the part in His story  – it will NEVER matter who is for you or against you because it’s not your fight – it’s not your story.

When I first got back here I was overwhelmed with the needs of the people. I kept hearing – After God there is only you – after God there is only you. I kept carrying their burdens and I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t stop my tears. And then out of nowhere it hit me – – WHY DO YOU SAY “AFTER” God? What they’re saying to me is all wrong. They’re putting more confidence in the person after God than they are in God himself. Whenever we do that – when we put our faith in someone else – more so than Christ – then that person will none-the-less – by default – being just human  – will disappoint. Why aren’t we saying ONLY God instead of AFTER God?  God may choose to use me to play a role where I help – but that’s for Him to write. These are His people and His burdens to carry…..

I met a guy at the conference who told me he got fired 3 days before the conference began. I asked him how? How is he not freaking out?? He said because it’s not about him, He’s always known who he works for – he has perfect job security. HE SAID TO GOD  – – TAKE MY LIFE AND LET IT BE  – ALL FOR YOU AND FOR YOUR GLORY – TAKE MY LIFE AND LET IT BE YOURS. He knows he is simply playing a role in God’s story.

The thing that I hate is that we don’t get to choose the role we play – we don’t get to decide which aisle in the bookstore it goes in. I’d love for my book to be something out of the children’s section but I think more often than not our books are in the self-help aisle. You know the problem with being in that section – means you got to go through something – a divorce, greif, losing a child, losing a friend – experience a tragedy. The only reason we go to the self-help aisle is because we want to learn from someone’s experience. If that is the section God chooses to put our book in  – than that means we got to go through an experience that we might not like so that others might benefit from our sacrifice and pain.

But the thing I am realizing is this – -there is freedom in knowing that the good/bad its all His. We cannot write a better story than God and yet how many times do we try to steal His pen?

I listened to a preacher talk the other night about the face of Jesus. That we are supposed to be the face of Jesus. This is not the same thing as simply setting an example. I wish you could have seen the passion this man had as he preached about the beauty of God’s face. I wish you could have seen him on his knees, with tears in his eyes – explaining the magnificence of Jesus Christ.  There is something different in setting a “good” example and REFLECTING THE FACE OF JESUS.

How many of you have seen Extreme Makeover Home edition? You know the story where they find a family with 12 kids – 3 are blind, 2 can’t walk – their house is falling down on them and a crew decides to build them a new home?  So they send the family to Disney World and fix the house up. When the family comes back there is a bus blocking the view of the house. The whole show is set up on three words — – MOVE THAT BUS. When the bus pulls out where do the cameras go? Do they go to the house?? No – they don’t. They focus on the family SEEING the house. The mom is balling, the husband trying to hold back the tears, and junior is jumping up and down. EVEN THOUGH WE HAVEN’T SEEN THE HOUSE – WE KNOW OF IT’S BEAUTY BY LOOKING AT THE FACES OF THE FAMILY WHO WILL DWELL THERE.

Do you see the difference in setting  an example and reflecting the face of Jesus?

I found myself moved to tears in hearing the passion of this preacher. I see the difference – but how do I get it? I mean I am a missionary to Haiti right? My job is to minister to people. Yet I was at a conference with 13,000 “leaders” of missions, churches, and non-profits –  who were crying  – begging to see the face of Jesus – – – even though we spend every day working in ministry.

Friends it is just not enough that we work in a ministry or we volunteer. I can volunteer to come to Haiti and complain the whole time that I don’t have adequate sleeping quarters and there isn’t enough food or water.  That doesn’t reflect nothing.

Reflecting the face of Jesus is so much deeper than that  – and maybe the way we get there is to lock ourselves up in a closet – kneel down- face to the ground – and worship this man of glory – this majestic – magnificient – full of mercy  – full of peace – full of compassion – King that is Jesus – –  – maybe we have to dig into a relatonship where we don’t simply say thanks God for the food – but we immerse him with love – all that we have – – – and we don’t rise up from the ground until we see that beautiful face – so we can then go out and TELL everyone what we’ve seen.

I saw the face of Jesus a few nights ago for the very first time. I felt the wrinkles in his forehead, I felt the softness of His cheeks, the mercy in His brows, the compassion in His eyes….this beauty beyond description.

You see it’s not about us – – – it’s not about our story — – it’s about His story. If we lived our life to make a mark for ourselves – we would waste our life on something so small. BUT if we lived a life to make a mark for HIM – it’s totally worth it. When it’s His story – this is the beauty of it – if you win – you win. But if you lose – you still win! You see it doesn’t matter – the good/bad – it’s all His.

God will take full responsibility for the life that is wholly devoted to Him. I don’t know the role you will play in it – but I know that this role requires us to be the face of jesus. So my challenge is – if you can’t feel his face – see his wrinkles, his brow, his eyes, his softeness – – then lock yourself up alone with Him until you do!

Don’t simply be His hands and feet…..be His face as well!

Take your life and let it be all for Him and all His glory – take your life and let it be HIS.


Before the world was made 
Before you spoke it to be
You were the King of Kings 
Yeah you were, yeah you were
And now you’re reigning still 
Enthroned above all things
Angels and saints cry out 
We join them as we sing

Glory to God, Glory to God
Glory to God, Forever
Glory to God, Glory to God
Glory to God, Forever 

Creator God you gave me breath so I could praise
Your great and matchless name 
All my days, all my days
So let my whole life be 
A blazing offering
A life that shouts and sings 
The greatness of the King

Glory to God, Glory to God
Glory to God, Forever
Glory to God, Glory to God
Glory to God, Forever

Take my life and let it be
All for you and for your glory
Take my life and let it be yours
Take my life and let it be
All for you and for your glory
Take my life and let it be yours

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