Posted in Personal Stories

Angel’s Mom (Kandiance)

My mom flew back from Haiti yesterday and we spent today at Angel’s house. I have to tell you that I have never seen Kandiance in so much pain. It was all my mom and I could do to hold back the tears – and there were a few times where we just couldn’t. Her rib is starting to stick through her skin and the pain is almost unbearable. She has no mobility in her arm and yesterday while receiving radiation her arm fell off the table and basically it feels like her shoulder is broken. Her shoulder and her arm and now her rib just radiates with pain. My mom read the 91st Psalm and then began to sing to her – in hopes she might be able to sleep. She didn’t sleep at all last night.

I listened to my mom sing about a dozen different songs but could not find the strength to hold back the tears through I SURRENDER ALL.

All to Jesus I surrender
All to Him I freely give;
I will ever love and trust Him,
In his presence daily live.

I surrender all, I surrender all;
All to thee, my blessed Savior,
I surrender all.

All to Jesus I surrender,
Humbly at His feet I bow,
Worldly pleasures all forsaken,
Take me Jesus, take me now.

Kandiance drifted to sleep hearing those precious words. She slept for nearly two hours. After she woke she was in tears and in MAJOR pain. The pain was so much that she began about an hour  straight of vomiting. Every time she did –  her rib would just hurt her so bad. Barely able to catch her breath we felt so helpless. Angel has taken off from work – and today they admitted her into the Hospice Care Center in the hospital. 

Mom and I left Kandiance today but our hearts and our minds are still there. Today I make a PLEA to everyone to pray for Angel and her mother. While my soul has always held out for a miracle – my heart is begging for the pain to be gone – whatever that might mean. Peace and freedom – comfort – those are my prayers on her behalf. 


Posted in Mission Stories, NW_Personal Ministry Update

This Is What Happens When I Can’t Sleep….

I’m laying in bed and watching the clock,
I’m wondering if this pain is ever going to stop.

My head is pounding and I feel so sick as I lay,
Tears and frustration are how I begin each day. 

Regardless of the reasons of why I black out, 
It can be scary and frustrating to not be up and about. 

It’s not just a song – God’s still working on me,
But how long does it take – I want to be done already.

He’s forcing me to rely on him each and every day, 
And I don’t really like it when I don’t get my way. 

I know it’s His desire to fill my heart with pure joy,
But it’s not going to be easy if he keeps giving me all boys! 🙂

I really want to pout and cry – woe is me,
But there are so many blessings – why can’t I just see?

Now with 7 little kids – I’ve been blessed in abundance,
And I’ll never find anyone who could be a better husband.

I’m surrounded with people that I know love me and care,
I get notes of encouragement and am lifted up in prayer.

So I want to thank all of you for your outpouring of love,
It keeps me focused off myself – and on things from above.

This is what happens when I can’t fall asleep –
I start writing poems – better that then to weep!

SO – I don’t want to hear if this poem doesn’t really rhyme,
It’s 3 in the morning – the sun hasn’t even started to shine!

Now I’ll start working on one of my famous Top 10 Lists –
Just pray you’re not on it – or you’re going to get dissed!! 🙂